Lots of women have a special way of being – that is behaving – in relationships. Do you?
It's like they suddenly revert back to an earlier version of themselves.
It's an anxiety thing.
It's as though everything they've learned, all the wisdom and expertise they've acquired over the years, doesn't exist. As though they do relationships from some small, needy place in themselves, rather than from their confident, mature, wise self?
“Ah but, Annie....” you might say. “That's perfectly normal, isn't it? That's because when it comes to affairs of the heart there is so much riding on getting it right.”
There's so much riding on it that... you have to give your anxiety its head, right?
Let's look at this a little more closely. You want something in your life – most commonly, your relationship – to be a certain way. And you're not too confident about it being that way. So, what do you do? You go right into your head and you worry about it. You focus on the anxiety which tells you an absolutely beastly story about how bad things could get and...
Not only do you let that story influence you in the way you interact with other people, but you expect other people to respond to your anxiety, too.
In fact, you do your level best to make them respond to your anxiety. Even though your anxiety may not make a lot of sense to them – or even any sense, at all.
Your anxiety is not the most intelligent, socially accomplished part of you, is it?
If youwere able to put your anxiety back into its little box, where it belongs, what would be different?
How would you behave instead?
What difference do you think that might make to the outcome?
You are so much more than your anxiety. Isn't it time you learned how to be free of that anxiety so you can have the life and the relationships you desire?